Trix
"So, you're the Sid I keep hearing so much about?" Trix asks.
"I am. All good things, I hope," he replies.
"Mostly. So, you're a 'dating coach'?" she presses.
"Yes, that is the job title."
“I’ve never heard of one of those. How do describe the job?”
“It’s simple. I help guys who haven’t had the romantic success they deserve have a little better luck out there.”
"Guys…meaning you don't have female clients?"
"Well, no. Not at the moment."
"But you know single men?"
"I know plenty."
"So, you can find me a husband?"
"I only do that for my clients."
“Well, maybe I’ll become one…”
"Leave him alone, Trix!" Alice cries.
This is a momentous day for Alice. She has, at long last, decided Sid is worthy of meeting her best friend. And that he’s able to handle her barrage of questions.
The two women have known each other since elementary school. At first, they despised each other because they both had a crush on the same bald first grader, Armando. 27 years later, Alice and Trix had both left the small Rhode Island town they grew up in, moved to New York City, and become gym/coffee/bar/everything else buddies.
Armando came out as gay on his 15th birthday. He’s been dating a trapeze artist for seven years. But that’s of little concern to Alice as she sits in the middle of a park bench on a picturesque spring day. Her closest friend on her left, her dating coach boyfriend on her right. Alice had thought that would allow her to play mediator. Instead, she’s found herself in the middle of a verbal jousting match.
"Why would I leave him alone? You present me a man whose literal job it is to help people find love, and I’m just supposed to ignore it?"
"It's fine, it really is," Sid interjects smoothly.
"You guys are supposed to be getting to know each other!" Alice exclaims.
"We are! I’m asking him about his life’s work!" Trix retorts. "So, Sid, any eligible bachelors for me or not?"
"Well…"
"Stop it! He's trying to relax, I'm sure he doesn't want to work when he's not working, just like you or me," Alice interjects. Sid thinks she’s coming to his defense. But Trix knows the truth: Alice is dying inside and would rather be discussing literally anything else. Even her foot wars (okay, maybe not).
"It's okay," Sid says, gently touching her forearm. “Let's say I do, Trix. Let's say I know many bachelors, and I can get you in a room with any one of them. What are you going to do then?"
"Oooh, I like him!" Trix says to Alice, grinning. "I would be like, 'YO! What up, you tryna bone or what?'"
The three of them burst into laughter.
"Okay, Alice, you move over there," Sid says, pointing to the end of the bench. "Let Trix sit here. Trix, you pretend I'm one of those eligible bachelors. Let's see what you've got."
Alice gets up from her seat and switches places with Trix.
"Wait, so what do I do?" Trix asks, a little unsure.
"Talk to me. Hit on me. Pretend I'm one of the guys you want to marry."
"Honey, they're supposed to be the ones approaching me."
"You say that, but how far has that line of thinking gotten you in life?" The question hits Trix straight in the solar plexus. "Most guys are shy and deathly afraid of rejection. You can make the move without even making a move, and they will do the rest."
"You don't have to do this," Alice interjects, looking a bit concerned.
"No, this is fun, I’m doing it," Trix replies, her competitive spirit kicking in. She turns to Sid, a mischievous gleam in her eye. "So, you come here often?"
"How dare you! I'm married!" He replies, pointing to his empty ring finger. "Whore!"
The girls can't help but laugh. "Be nice, Sid!" Alice cries, stifling her giggles.
"Fineee," Sid says, a playful smirk on his face. "Again."
"So, what's up?" Trix tries again.
"What's up?" Sid asks, squinting dramatically. "Are you hitting on me?"
"Maybe I am."
"No thanks, I'm Christian, and you are far too forward for me... whore!"
"SID!" Alice cries, a mix of surprise and laughter in her voice.
"Dude, stop! This is hard enough for me as it is," Trix adds, trying to keep a straight face.
"Fineee," Sid replies, enjoying himself immensely.
"What's up, I'm single, wanna bone?" Trix asks, throwing caution to the wind.
"Trix!" Alice exclaims, shocked but amused.
"Okay, okay," Trix takes a breath and tries one last time. With a hint of desperation in her voice, she turns back to Sid with a simple, “Hey.”
"Hi," Sid replies, his expression finally softening.
"So, how about those New York Knicks?"
Sid pauses, a genuine smile spreading across his face. "I've been waiting for someone to ask me that all day."