Pressure

Krishna was called into his boss's office. Is it ever a good thing to be called into your boss's office? There is so much more downside than upside. No one ever calls you in to tell you, 'You are doing a phenomenal job! Keep up the good work! Oh, and we're doubling your salary." No, that doesn't happen, ever. At least not in India. Krishna didn't understand it though. He had been a scientist for two years now and he thought he was doing a good job. He was the hardest worker at his office. He regularly worked 12 hours a day, 7 days a week. He may not always be the first one in but he was always the last one out. He lived in the lab. What would he do if he got fired? He expected the worst when he sat down in front of his boss.

"Krishna, I have good news for you," said his boss. "There is a university in New York that reached out to me. They are recruiting scientists and I recommended you for the position. They want to interview you."
"Me ma'am?" said Krishna. He was somewhere between shocked and dumbfounded.
"Yes, you. You are the hardest worker here and I think you are the most deserving of the opportunity. It was an easy choice."
"Thank you so much, ma'am. But if I get the job I will have to move?"
"Yes, to New York."
"For how long ma'am?"
"The work visa would be for two years and then you can renew it if they want you to work there longer."
"And what about my family ma'am?"
"What about your family?"
"My wife and son, can they come with me?"
"Yes, that is a possibility. It might hurt you're chances but it's possible."
"Hurt my chances?"
"Well if it's only you going then they only have to file for one visa. If you take your family. It's three. It's more money for them to spend."
"Okay, ma'am." Krishna seemed worried.
"Relax Krishna. This is a good thing! Everyone else would kill for this opportunity. Now, you haven't gotten the job yet, you still have to interview. Once you get the job then you can think all thee things over but first, you have to get the job."
"Thank you, ma'am."
"Of course."
"When is the interview ma'am?"
"The phone call is scheduled for a week from now."
"Ok, thank you, ma'am." Krishna got up to leave.
"Oh, Krishna."
"Yes, ma'am?"
"Good luck! As far as opportunities go, this is a pretty big one."
"Yes ma'am. Thank you, ma'am." He left the office.

This was the opportunity Krishna had been waiting for. The opportunity that he had been working for. A chance to go to America. To not only change his own life but also change the trajectory of the lives of his entire family. Krishna came from a poor family in a small town in India. He was never supposed to become anything. His father expected him to follow in his footsteps and work for the Indian rail system. But Krishna did not want that, it had no upside. Instead, after completing his post-doctorate, he left his small town for New Delhi. He didn't have a job lined up, he just left. He had 500 rupees in his pocket when he reached New Delhi. He crashed on his friend's couch for 6 long months until he found a job working for the preeminent research lab in New Delhi. The job that he had now.

Krishna also had a family. He started making money for the first time in his life when he started his post-doctorate. In India, when a man starts making money there is only one thing left to do. That man has to get married. That's just the way things were done. So Krishna got married. A year later he had a son. When he left for New Delhi he couldn't take them with him. He had nowhere to take them. When he finally got a job and a place of his own his wife and son would come to stay with him during the summers, while his son's school was out of session. Those were the best times. He loved having his family with him, it gave him strength. He would wake up, go to work for 5 hours, come back home for lunch, have lunch with his wife, play a game of chess with his son, go back to work for 5 hours, come back home, and go out with his family to explore the city. He was always sad to see his family go when summer ended. He was all alone again.

This was all on Krishna's mind as he prepared for his interview. On the one hand, it was the opportunity of a lifetime. On the other, did he really want to go to a foreign country without his family? Yes, he went to New Delhi alone but he could be back home in a day if he wanted. It was only 8 hours by train. New York was a 14-hour flight. Did he really want to be thousands of miles away from his wife? From his six-year-old son? It was depressing enough working so much, but now, to do it in a new place, knowing no one, by himself? That seemed like a fate worse than death. And isn't New York cold too? Snow? Fuck! What would he eat? Burgers? That's no kind of life.

Who was he kidding? He wasn't in a position to choose. If they gave him the job he had to take it. He had to go. So what if he wasn't happy? He knew a lot of unhappy people. That is the price you paid to move forward. To make it. You sacrifice you're own happiness so that maybe your son can have the power to choose. The power to be happy.

He had to snap out of it. He hadn't even gotten the job yet! Not only that, he HAD to get that job. This was his big break, his big chance. If he couldn't seize this opportunity, it would haunt him for the rest of his life. He knew that. There are days and then there are DAYS. This was a big one, no one could deny that. How do you prepare for the biggest interview of your life? An opportunity so great that you are certain that you will never have it again. An opportunity that you have worked your whole life for. He was 34. Not old but also not young. He did not have infinite time left to make something of himself. It was truly now or never. If he doesn't get the job then it is back to the same old life. Working 12 hours a day just to be a little bit better than poor. If he gets the job? He didn't know what would happen then. But at least there would be some upside there. A chance to have a better life, a brighter life. He didn't know what else to do before his interview, so he called his wife.

"Are you nervous?" asked his wife.
"Very," replied Krishna.
"Don't be. Either way, we will be here. Life isn't so bad the way things are."
"I know. But this was always the plan, always the goal. And now it's here and I feel the weight of it."
"The weight of what?"
"The weight of the opportunity. It's a lot."
"Listen to me. It doesn't matter to me one bit whether you get the job or not. Whether you are a rich man or a poor man we will always be here. Nothing changes. It's just one interview. If it's meant to be, it will happen. If it doesn't, it doesn't. There will be other opportunities. Just go and do you're best."
"Okay."
"I have someone else here that wants to say something to you." She handed the phone to his son.
"Hi, Dad! How are you?" asked his son.
"I'm good, beta. How are you?" replied Krishna.
"I'm great, Dad. I miss you! I've been playing so much chess. I can't wait to come back and play with you again. I'm going to win this time!"
"Yes, beta. Keep playing and you will for sure."
"Mom keeps talking about some interview. What's that about?"
"I have an interview for a big job later, beta."
"So? What's the big deal?"
"No big deal, beta. No big deal."
"See Mom! It's no big deal," said his son away from the receiver. "Okay Dad, Mom says I have to hang up now because you're busy. Bye, Dad. I love you!"
"Bye, beta." He hung up the phone. He was fighting back tears.

Krishna was working in the lab waiting for the phone to ring. He had been nervous all day. But after the phone call with his family, a calmness came over him. It was a surprising development, even to him. He knew what he had to do. The phone rang.

"Hello," said Krishna.
"Hi, is this Krishna?" asked a voice on the phone.
"Yes, this is Krishna, ma'am."
"Hi! This is Suman calling from NYU. How are you doing?"
"Good ma'am. How are you?"
"Good. Your boss had a lot of nice things to say about you."
"Thank you, ma'am."
"Should we start the interview?"
"Can I say something, ma'am?"
"Huh? Okay, yeah say whatever you want."
"Ma'am I say this with all the respect in the world. I know if I get this job I will have to move to New York. But if I cannot bring my family with me, I do not want this job. There is no point in me interviewing for it."
"I see. And why is that?"
"Why is what?"
"Why is it so important for you to bring your family with you?"
"Do you have kids, ma'am?"
"Yes, I have two sons. Why do you ask?"
"You see I have a son too ma'am. He's 6 years old and for the last two years, I have seen him 2 months out of the year. I am a very simple man, I do not have a lot. I come from a poor family. But I do have a wife and a son and they make me very happy. I work a lot and my work has brought me away from them. And now, if I get this job I will have to go even further away from them. Instead of two months, I will see them once a year. To me, that is not worth it. I know I will make a lot more money there than I ever could here. But no amount of money is worth missing the bulk of my son's life. After all, why am I doing all this ma'am? Who am I doing this for? Yes a little bit for me, but it's for him that I work so hard. So that he could have a better life. So that he could be happy. Well, it turns out that the thing that makes my son the happiest is spending time with his father. Something I have deprived him of for the last two years. I can't keep doing that. So if this job takes me away from him, then I don't want it. It is as simple as that. As I said, ma'am, I am a simple man. I am more than capable of continuing to live a simple life."
"I see. That was quite a speech."
"I'm sorry if I was out of line, ma'am."
"Well I guess you were right, there is no need for this interview anymore." Krishna's heart sank in his chest.
"Okay, ma'am. I understand."
"I will make sure you and you're family all get visas. I'll see you in a few months. Pack a jacket."
"What?"
"You're hired, Krishna. Go tell your family the good news."
"Thank you so much, ma'am." Krishna was jumping out of his seat with excitement.
"No, thank you. It's been a long time since I interviewed someone like you. People are so caught up in what they want and their own aspirations that they often forget about everything and everyone else. New York could use more people like you."
"Thank you, ma'am. I won't let you down."
"I know you won't. Oh, and what's you're son's name?"
"His name?"
"Yes, what's his name?"
"Ankit ma'am. His name is Ankit."
"Ankit, nice name. I look forward to meeting him."