Caffeine Dreams

Coffee itself is whatever. Coffee shops, on the other hand, are where it's at, so let’s walk through opening one together.

As entrepreneurs, we have a lot of autonomy to run our space. We can make a coffee shop fit the exact vibe we want. There is some art there, some personal stake. We can create a little bit of something for ourselves, a place just to our liking.

Oh, and we’re drug dealers.

The drug, of course, is caffeine. And it might be the greatest drug ever discovered. Other drugs aim to reach the heights caffeine has reached. Caffeine is energy! We are literally selling energy. That, my friend, is a business that is only going to go up.

The upside? The next Starbucks. Fuck that, Starbucks has strong coffee that tastes like shit, but the vibe is only good in otherwise boring locales. But they have strong coffee. And so will we, the strongest coffee in all the land. And that will be something to truly cherish. That is our ticket to the top. Caffeine, caffeine, caffeine.

The cost? A lot, probably. Let’s be prepared to lose 100K on the idea.

The real upside? You will have a place to call your own that is not your home.

The REAL upside? We replace alcohol. I'm serious.

Yes, we all love our dranks, but they come at a real cost. The cost, the empty calories, the liver damage: alcohol is fundamentally bad for the consumer. Sure, it brings us firmly into the moment and makes us more talkative and relaxed, so it’ll always have a place. But does it have to be the centerpiece of Western civilization? Something always has to be, but I don't see why we can't replace alcohol with caffeine.

Our drug has no fucking downside. Maybe that's the problem. Caffeine is too perfect. I did hear of one guy at a trading floor snorting caffeine before the market open every morning.

Then he had an idea to open a coffee shop.

Like I said, perfection.